VIRTUOUS WOMEN

My mom and sister, Courtney, also had birthdays in October.  It was fun to celebrate just by hanging out, on a Friday night, together as a family.  There was of course Cafe Rio, presents, laughs, and dessert.  We love you Oma!!!  We are a lucky group of women to have such an amazing mom like you!!!!  A mother who has always loved the Lord and has walked faithfully in the paths of virtue.  As I've thought about this I have felt inspired to share something quite personal in hopes of helping other women.

I recently heard a talk given by author, Jodi Marie Robinson, who wrote one of my favorite books, Women of Virtue.  In her book she expresses that "true beauty is felt, more than it is seen."
Sister Robinson was an amazing speaker who discussed issues such as self-esteem, body image, modesty and of course the umbrella topic, VIRTUE.

I left that meeting feeling so inspired and determined to guard virtue and be more virtuous in everything I do/say.  She taught that virtue is so much more than moral purity, but it encompasses so much more.  In her own words, "Virtue is a pattern of thought and behavior that signifies goodness and holiness."  As I pondered what she taught I realized that I needed to improve my own patterns of thought and behavior.  I have struggled, just like many women, with the worries of the world... our physical appearance.
  
I found it difficult after having each of my kids to love myself.  I had always had a strong relationship with myself growing up and previously to having children, but the battle of getting back into shape both physically and mentally was almost unbearable.  After looking back I realized that the battle mentally was even more difficult.  I was so hard on myself and expected perfection in everything I did.  That infection of perfection sadly fell into my physical expectation of myself.  These thoughts and expectations affected my spirituality and my focus on the eternal perspective... What really mattered!!!  


There were times when I fought to get that eternal perspective back into view, but I found myself on this continual roller coaster, fighting to stay on top.  The world was winning.  I often felt guilty and incapable of winning.  I would try, over and over, to rid myself of such negative thinking and obsessing, but those negative thoughts and high/unrealistic expectations were constantly making an appearance in my mind.  


I would be lying if I said I never battle such thoughts and feelings anymore, but I have made some great progress.  I do feel like I have overcome some major obstacles and love myself more than ever before.  I have a saying in my home that reads, "If only you could see yourself the way I do."  I can only imagine the Lord, Jesus Christ, my Savior saying those words to me, which I often do.  Tears usually follow that image.  He does love me and he loves each one of us... unconditionally.  


Sister Robinson's book and talk have been a great resource for me during these moments of trial.  Filling my mind with truth, focus on doing/serving, praying, and helping others love themselves, have been other key elements that have helped me to find a perfectly happy place in a very imperfect world.  

Gordon B. Hinckley taught, "There is nothing more beautiful than a woman who walks in the paths of virtue with a knowledge of why she should do so."  I'm so grateful for the gospel of Jesus Christ where I learn that the power of virtue can be a guiding light through this life.  I don't need to see beauty, but I feel beautiful when I am walking in the paths of virtue with a knowledge that I am following in his footsteps.  It is my prayer that, just like my mother, I can teach the beauty of virtue to my young daughter... so that she will always know of her own great worth!!!!